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Festivus
02:31
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Festivus Lyrics
On december twenty third
You would remember if you'd heard
That is the date we celebrate
this great absurdity
Not just the birth of Eddie Vedder
That’s great, but this is even better
Let’s coalesce together close
no roasted bird or tree
What could this be
What do we call it
Makes light our hearts
But not our wallets
A conservative alternative to mainstream holidays
It’s Frank Constanza’s Festivus
You bring along a guest who must
Partake in the unrest with us
Confess what blights their soul
So have a blessed festivus
Invented by the stressed and fussed
That once a year the best of us
Could raise a metal pole
Then we air our grievances
Elaborating to great length
The ways our kin have peeved us, yes
And then we hold the feats of strength
And when you’ve pinned your father
That’s when festivus is over
But if you just get smothered
Then I guess…it never ends!
We’re celebrating festivus
Cause Weltschmerz has infested us
When faced with Christmas zest
Disgust’s a thing we can't control
So have a friend at festivus
Express at the behest of us
The reason they’re distressed with us,
Shortcomings to extoll
Won’t you invest in festivus
No need to be obsessed with us
You only need request and just
Like that you’ll be enrolled
So have a happy festivus
The feast set for the rest of us
For once a year, the best of us
We raise a metal pole
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Festivus (Instrumental)
02:31
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4. |
The Human Fund (Excerpt)
00:11
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Ben Brooklyn, New York
I’m a freelance animator, illustrator, web/graphic designer, musician, and writer.
I'll let you punch me for ten dollars.
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